Tradeoffs

I love the beginnings of things. Starting a new book. Writing that first journal entry. Signing up for music lessons. Joining a gym. On an unrelated note I’ve come to realize the obvious truth that going to the gym for a work out takes a lot more time than the hour long work out session. Getting there, coming back, finding a parking space, waiting for the metro, etc. all takes precious time! Indeed, the accountability provided through a gym or lessons can be invaluable, but if you can muster up the motivation to do the burpees at home and pick up a new instrument through youtube lessons in the time saved that’s fantastic too. Saves money, saves time, and you can focus your energy and time on your career, family, friends, volunteer work, church, exploring faith, whatever floats your boat.

Health can definitely turn into an idol in my life. I listen to podcasts, I read blogs about it, I love it, and I’m not apologetic that it’s a passion of mine; however, I do find that it has been encroaching on my time with God and the other good things in life.

I’ve been hanging out with older people (75+) quite a bit in Seoul, and what I’ve realized is that longevity is awesome. And if you can maintain quality of life and all your teeth while you’re at it that’s even more awesome, but I’ve also come to grips with the fact that it’s overrated. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a death wish or a desire to be ridden with dementia, but confronting decay, hurt, injury, loss in this life is inevitable, and experiencing longevity can be a lonely endeavor.

All the n=1 experimentation, my body, my allergies, my health, my my my my…. has made me self-involved. I think I’m finally finally reaching a place where I’ve figured out what works for me. Macronutrient wise, exercise wise everything. I just hope I can now use that as a tool to focus on other areas of my life in a healthier, stronger way than I was able to on a SAD diet.

On another note, I watched the documentary We Were Here about the arrival of AIDS in San Francisco and found it deeply moving. I recommend it to anyone who believes in the humanity that binds us all.

Over and out. It’s 12:21 am and I’m going to bed! Goodnight!

Cutting down on fructose and experimenting with a glucose monitor

Observations over the past few months:

1) Fructose (even in the form of fruit and even when mixed with protein and fat) insidiously raises my fasting blood sugar in the morning.  3 oranges and 1 slice of watermelon kept my blood sugar elevated 8 HOURS LATER.  Fructose is notorious for screwing with insulin sensitivity.  Turns out I’m certainly not an exception to that!

2) Shrimp paste is the bomb.  Shrimp paste is pickled tiny shrimps.  It packs flavor to any veggie stir-”fry”.  (not truly a fry because I don’t use oil when I use the shrimp paste) – Mushrooms and zucchini sauteed together in anchovy stock + shrimp paste may sound way too fishy, but this is not so when using homemade ingredients!

(Shrimp paste should be this pretty pink color as seen below.  It should not be pale/white and lifeless, though I realize technically the shrimp are very much pickled and dead.)

shrimp paste

3) There are only a couple tsp of sugar/glucose circulating in your entire bloodstream at any time.  It only takes 1/2 tsp more for you to be diabetic.

4) Nuts are a no go.  Have you ever tried to stop eating salted macadamia nuts??!  It’s a tall order.

5) Sleep is awesome and THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO FOR YOURSELF.  Regular sleep and getting to bed before midnight is even better.  You want a magical elixir for longevity, nice skin, and robust immunity?  Go make peace with your bed.

Contradictions

*We seek out free range eggs and grass fed beef but keep our kids cooped up in classrooms all day long.

*Jesus emphasized unconditional love to those shunned and abandoned by society, but somehow Christians have become synonymous with discrimination and hate, especially toward homosexuals.

*I judge people for the very characteristics with which I struggle.

*I don’t demand perfection from my friends and family members, yet I expect that for myself.

*I say I don’t have enough time, yet I find time to watch the season premieres of Mad Men and Game of Thrones…

*Honesty is the best policy, but white lies are okay.

*I read blogs about health and sometimes sacrifice sleep (possibly the best cure-all known to man) for it.

*I get stressed knowing I need to relax.

Stay the course.  Persevere.  Don’t overanalyze or harbor grudges.  Trust yourself.  Open the windows, even if it’s cold; ventilate.  Stay conscious.  Then sleep.

my dog who keeps it simple

Smartphone, it’s over – I’m sleeping alone

Yes, yet again, it has been a bajillion years since my last update, but alas! a new post about how it’s over between me and my iphone. No more snuggling in bed together and reading up on all the random topics that piqued my interest during the day in the dark on a small screen at 1 am. No more!! Because sleep = life. And no sleep = death. We get a kick of dopamine/a rush when we find out something new, which is what internet surfing does for me. Thankfully, I don’t spend my time on fb or social networking sites during this time. Instead, because I get hit by this voracious appetite for information as soon as I hit the bed, the lights are off and I’m recounting my day, my questions, my interests, my bucketlist, I start reading about infectious diseases, ponzi schemes, travel destinations, feminist issues, civil rights issues, and animal adoption in the dark at 1 am. Oh gosh, I have issues. I have a hard time stopping even after I get tired. This blog is primarily about allergies and a healthy way of eating but good food is gonna do me no good if I ain’t sleeping.

I have always gone to sleep on the late side (past midnight) for the majority of my life and have always struggled to wake up. Some people are wired to function better at night, but I <;3 love <;3 waking up with the sun and going to bed when it gets dark because when I fall into this habit during hiking or camping trips, my skin starts glowing, I know my immune system is blasting ahead at full speed, and I just feel freaking invincible.

So, concrete steps I will take:

1. Turning wifi off / turning on airplane mode.

2. Getting ready for bed a couple hours before I have to hit the sack aka right after I publish this post. Sometimes I want to go to bed but it ends up getting pushed off because I procrastinate and take forever to do my bedtime ritual of brushing teeth, washing my face, putting pj's on, etc.

3. Reading. Not knitting. Knitting turns on my robot psycho mode where I channel all my obsessive energy into two needles and alpaca yarn, and surprise this does not make me sleepy in any shape or form. It's great at relieving my stress and endowing me with repetitive stress injury (just kidding knitting is awesome), but it definitely does not work as a bedtime ritual.

4. Just forgetting / effing everything else and sleeping!!! My sister is amazing at this. Crazy paper and test due the next day? She'll sleep and figure it out in the morning. Me? I become this rabid squirrel chomping away at crunchy foods and typing away and deleting, typing away and deleting… for what? for a good grade? bah. not worth it. This is a mind shift I need to implement asap because sleep trumps the petty stuff. If it's not life or death it can wait til tomorrow!

5. I do keep Now Foods True Calm handy – it's an amino acid blend that's supposed to calm you down. It hasn't worked any miracles, but I figure it doesn't hurt.

Did/does anyone have a tough time sleeping and if so, what did/have you done about it? Please share and help a fellow bedtime zombie amiga out.

Acne flareups and amnesia

It’s been really hard to avoid my allergens in Seoul.  I love Seoul, the people, the culture, the infrastructure, and the food so much, but it’s been too much for me to say no to the same foods over and over again.  And so for the past two weeks, I’ve been quite reckless about eating foods I shouldn’t.  I’ve tried to avoid my allergens, but I’ve been eating grain fed meat again and consuming way too many sugars and sweet desserts, which almost always have corn and soybean oil in them.

As a result, my skin has started to break out along the jawline quite terribly again, and it’s been discouraging to say the least.  But what I find most interesting is my amnesia.  I’m now convinced that the human condition makes us forget our difficult times with ease.  I know I pray or change my diet or stick to a great sleep schedule when things have gotten out of hand, but once life starts to fall in place, I slide and forget about the steps I took to get there in the first place.  I’ve done this cycle one too many times, and as a result, I’m convinced the real fight may be one against selective memory loss of the tough times…

South Korea is a culture that revolves around the skin deep in many ways.  It’s superficial, and people are often judged by how much they weigh, the clothes they wear, and the texture of their skin (especially for girls).  I sometimes have to take a concerted step back and remember not to become intoxicated by skin deep beauty: pearly skin, pretty clothes, and long legs.

I haven’t been the best about blogging, but after letting out some of my thoughts in writing, I realized I’ve also forgotten how meditative this practice can be.

Living with allergies in Seoul, Korea

Happy new year from Seoul, South Korea!

I arrived in Seoul a couple days ago and will be living here for the next couple months.  The few times I’ve eaten out I’ve broken out into hives along my hips, collar bones, and stomach, so avoiding soy and sesame here has not been easy.

A few foods that have kept me sane:

1. Boiled or roasted chestnuts – when they’re boiled, they’re incredibly creamy

2. Boiled, steamed, or baked Asian sweet potatoes (the kind with the purplish skin and yellow flesh) – I’m trying to eat less fruit and more starchy tubers as my carb source, and this food has been my DAILY staple.  I eat it with sauerkraut or kimchi, or as the dessert to my meal, or come to think of it… as a standalone meal.  All three ways are incredibly satisfying both mentally and physically.

3. Seafood – the beautiful BEAUTIFUL thing about South Korea is that the seafood options are immense, diverse, and very clean and well-presented.  The supermarkets here are so impressive.  Koreans are VERY particular about clean supermarkets, and competition amongst them is fierce, so immaculate presentation of foods is a must.  Who benefits the most from this nice setup?  The consumer!  =)

4. Persimmons

Instead of dwelling on what I can’t eat (which, in Korea, is quite a lot) I dwell on foods I CAN eat, and I relearn everyday how foods in their whole states are already SO complex, delicious, and satisfying.

Hope your new year is filled with joy, laughter, good health, and deepening relationships.

happy birthday jesus

thanks for showing me what it means to love, serve, and forgive

merry christmas!  <| :]

Citrus allergies & a fermented foods love affair

Updates:

1. Yup, it’s official.  I gots a citrus allergy.  So no mas clementines (by the crate) and grapefruit.

2. I’ve been consuming at least half a cup of natural, raw, fermented foods daily, and it’s been AWESOME.  Amazing digestion and super regular BMs.  I am a happy camper.  More specifically re: fermented foods, I’ve been eating raw pickled ginger carrots- no lactic bacteria starter cultures), raw sauerkraut, and homemade kimchi.  If you have digestion issues, I highly recommend getting used to these deliciously sour, tangy foods!

3. Knitting has been my salvation.  I just picked up how to crochet as well, and that’s fun, too, but I think knitting is my first true love.  It’s such a positive way to channel my compulsiveness.  I’m really happy I found it.

4. 30-day challenges – I recently watched a ted video by an engineer at google who started doing random 30-day challenges, i.e. biking to work for 30 days, trying a new diet for 30 days, no email after 9 pm for 30 days, etc.  He said that each month no longer just passed him by, as each month now had a specific purpose.  I thought this was FANTASTIC.  We talk about how life’s so short all the time, so why not embark on a challenge that helps us live purposefully with an overarching goal for each day/month?  I don’t know if I’ll go on specific 30-day challenges – I don’t think I’d do well with the rigidity of the 30 day schedule, but I’m going to keep the sentiment in mind as I ring in the new year.  Good stuff.

5. Desires: I’d like to become proficient in more languages, sprint faster, do a pull up with a pull bar and eventually a thick log type bar, knit something super complicated and colorful, start painting again (on the cheap… this will be an endeavor in it of itself), play cello regularly, not kill myself while snowboarding, especially when it’s icy, learn basic self defense to get myself out of a sticky situation if need be, and do all these things on the most frugal budget possible.

6. Random musings about the holiday season: I’ve noticed increased impatience and hostility in crowds and the general population (well, at least in NYC) during the holiday season, and all I have to say is: this is crazy!  The holiday spirit should increase our capacity for generosity, love, and understanding, but everybody’s rushing and honking so much (myself absolutely included in this naughty group of people) that people come home hurt physically and tired emotionally.  And that’s never good.  Anyway, I’m going to try to do my part in not getting frustrated at someone walking slowly in zigzags on the sidewalk and be early for things, so I don’t rush and get into an accident.

Love and peace!

Knitting, standing desks, and intermittent fasting

Three weeks ago, I ordered this: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002HJFS4U/ref=oh_o03_s00_i00_details from Amazon to serve as my (standing) desk.  I was using my dresser top as a makeshift standing desk for some time, but I finally decided to amazon prime it up (rationalization: it’s for my health! and it can be an early christmas gift to myself- yes, weaksauce) and order a desk that matched the dresser height I was working on.  I decided to switch to a standing desk because I do not want to die early, have blood clots, or suffer from a flat rear.  I also genuinely enjoy standing while working/internetting.  I don’t stand all the time, but I stand most of the time, and I enjoy not having to fight as much inertia to transition to exercise / squat for no good reason / go out for a walk or run.

Last week, I finished knitting my first scarf:

I’ve always loved arts and crafts since I was a child.  I have a compulsive streak, so the arts were a perfect place for me to do it in a safe way.  They say college is where hobbies go die, and that is indeed what happened to me.  I stopped painting, drawing, making things… So I finally decided to re-start.  Knitting has been incredibly meditative, and strangely, it’s been quite the dandy weight loss tool.  Maybe because I can’t eat when my hands are busy?  Anyway, there is something special about working with one’s hands to create something that a family member, friend, or stranger can wear.  I’m currently knitting two green winter hats.  There’s also something immensely satisfying about making clothing/forays into self-sufficiency…

Intermittent fasting: I’ve been doing it unintentionally, and I think that may be the best way to do it.  I’ve kept myself busy with dance, knitting, work, and other random pursuits, so I find myself no longer eating… recreationally or destructively.  I also have much more regular bowel movements eating one pretty large meal a day and a couple of small snacks, rather than three medium-sized meals.  I’m pretty sure I’ve been losing some weight eating this way as well, though I haven’t weighed myself in a while, as I no longer weigh myself more than once a month…

Regarding my allergies, everything is still going swimmingly.  Staying away from my allergens has resolved the bulk of my skin issues.  However, I think I’m still reacting to citrus fruits, particularly oranges.  I did a skin prick test at the doctor’s office to confirm my blood test allergy results and found that I had the strongest response to peanuts, sesame, and green peas.  Then, corn and soy.  I also had slight reactions to wheat and mustard, but I’m not going to go crazy avoiding those, since they didn’t show up on the blood test.

The most important thing I’ve learned over the past month and a half? GET BACK UP.  Everyone falls down.  EV-ERY-ONE.  Don’t be an asshole and get stuck on the fact that you fell, put all your mental effort and energy into getting back up.  And it’s definitely okay to ask for help to get back up or to not fall down the next time!  I never went into my health problems in gory detail on this blog, but I really struggled with the mental and physical consequences of it for four/five long, long roller coaster years.  Anyway, you can do this!  You can live the life you want!  Rah rah!

Death and Priorities

Earlier this week, my bio teacher from high school passed away from lung cancer.  He was 37.  The doctors told him he had terminal lung cancer only ten days before he passed.

Everyone dies.  Yet, it’s so easy to live like we never will.  We procrastinate.  We leave things to tomorrow.  We don’t sleep!  We take longer than we should to forgive those we love.  We hesitate to take off our shoes and walk on the grass barefoot.

I want to leave this world a better place than the way I found it.  Health- it’s great.  I haven’t always had it, so I know illness can crush joy and warp perspective.  But health by yourself is actually kind of sad.  If you’re healthy but your child or sister or parent is sick, yes, it’s undeniable that you will be better equipped at least physically to take care of your loved one, but it’s sad because that’s when we realize it isn’t health but the intangibles: love, hope, friendship, and faith on which we so desperately rely.

When I listen to good music, talk to close friends about our parents’ health concerns, laugh with family over a turkey on Thanksgiving, or watch documentaries about the most amazing animals in the world: ants, honeybees, and dolphins, all of which I have done this week, I can’t help but become all contemplative about life, God, and purpose…

Hope you had a blessed Thanksgiving whether you spent it alone or with family and friends